Thereby hangs a tail
I was cooking a stew and popped back to the kitchen to see how it was simmering, when I noticed a small lizard in the sink (only two or three inches long).Wanting to match reaction speeds, I grabbed him by the tail … having forgotten, of course, that they can shed their tails when attacked and panicked.
I had also forgotten how the tail still wriggles afterwards.
And - no - it did not go into the stew.
You have to take your turban off. This is the United States
ROANOKE RAPIDS, N.C. — A Halifax County man was turned away from a local mission when he refused to remove his turban while trying to make a donation.When Gary Khera, went with his wife to the Union Mission on Roanoke Avenue to make a donation, a staffer asked him to remove his turban.
"She said,
" Khera recounted. "That made me a little upset. I am a United States citizen."Sir, you have to take your turban off. This is the United States
Khera, citing his religious beliefs, declined. He is a Sikh with dual U.S. and Indian citizenship.
Florence Williams, the mission's in-take director, countered with the facility's policy that requires that men remove head coverings indoors. Rev. Ron Weeks, executive director of the mission, seconded her argument.
“He wanted to become argumentative, and I asked him to please leave,” Weeks said.
Offended, Khera left and took his money with him. He said that he and his wife have given to the mission in years past, always by mailing a check. This year, he wanted to see where his donation was going.
The mission building contains a chapel, and employees consider the entire building "the Lord's house," Weeks said. A sign in the lobby outlines the policy against hats or other headwear inside.
"We have policy, and he didn't want to abide by it," said Weeks. "He gave the receptionist a bad time and decided to do a vengeance thing because he didn't get his own way. This was nothing to do with the turban, nothing to do with his faith."
Weeks said the mission would welcome Khera's donation if he mailed it or had his wife bring it in.
Khera denied that he was disruptive or argumentative. He asserts that he calmly tried to explain that he was there to give a donation.
Now he'll take his money elsewhere.
"They should not turn away a donation for the needy, because they misunderstood someone else's religion," he added.
Weeks said he may consider changing the policy because of the incident.
Anti-terror law requires God be acknowledged
I don't get it. Isn't god in cahoots with the terrorists? They say that they're doing it in his his name. But, then again, so do the other guys.Under state law, God is Kentucky's first line of defense against terrorism.
The 2006 law organizing the state Office of Homeland Security lists its initial duty as "stressing the dependence on Almighty God as being vital to the security of the Commonwealth."
Specifically, Homeland Security is ordered to publicize God's benevolent protection in its reports, and it must post a plaque at the entrance to the state Emergency Operations Center with an 88-word statement that begins,
The safety and security of the Commonwealth cannot be achieved apart from reliance upon Almighty God
State Rep. Tom Riner, a Southern Baptist minister, tucked the God provision into Homeland Security legislation as a floor amendment that lawmakers overwhelmingly approved two years ago.
As amended, Homeland Security's religious duties now come before all else, including its distribution of millions of dollars in federal grants and its analysis of possible threats.
The time and energy spent crediting God are appropriate, said Riner, D-Louisville, in an interview this week.
"This is recognition that government alone cannot guarantee the perfect safety of the people of Kentucky," Riner said. "Government itself, apart from God, cannot close the security gap. The job is too big for government."
Nonetheless, it is government that operates the Office of Homeland Security in Frankfort, with a budget this year of about $28 million, mostly federal funds. And some administrations are more religious than others.
Under previous Gov. Ernie Fletcher, a lay Baptist preacher, Homeland Security interpreted the law at face value, prominently crediting God in its annual reports to state leaders and posting the required plaque.
Under Gov. Steve Beshear, officials this week said they didn't know about the plaque until the Herald-Leader called to ask whether it's still there. (They checked; it is.) The 2008 Homeland Security report, issued a month ago, did not credit God, but it did complain about a decline in federal funding from Washington.
Thomas Preston, Beshear's Homeland Security chief, said he isn't interested in stepping into a religious debate, and he hasn't given this part of his duties much thought.
"I will not try to supplant almighty God," Preston said. "All I do is try to obey the dictates of the Kentucky General Assembly. I really don't know what their motivation was for this. They obviously felt strongly about it."
There is no reference to God in Homeland Security's current mission statement or on its Web site, which displeases Riner.
"We certainly expect it to be there, of course," Riner said.
But state Sen. Kathy Stein, D-Lexington, said Homeland Security should worry about public safety threats instead of preaching religious homilies.
"It's very sad to me that we do this sort of thing," said Stein, a frequent critic of efforts to mix religion and government. "It takes away from the seriousness of the public discussion over security, and it clearly hurts the credibility of this office if it's supposed to be depending on God, first and foremost."
Dog day afternoon
Just down the street from my office, at City Plaza (by the Lion City hotel) a man wearing a sari walked into UOB (United Overseas Bank) yesterday and threatened to use his mobile 'phone detonate a bomb in the box he was holding, if they didn't hand over the loot.Unfortunately for him a security guard had already noticed his heavy stubble and he didn;t get very far.
"There are four million stories in the naked city…"
Vatican reintroduces clocking in
The Vatican has reintroduced a system of clocking in, nearly 50 years after it was last phased out.Senior clerics will have to swipe plastic cards when entering and leaving, all in a drive to improve time-keeping and efficiency.
It was Pope John XXIII, fondly known as the Good Pope, who phased out clocking machines in the early 1960s.
Now the Vatican has brought back a high-tech version involving electronic swipe cards for 2,000 employees.
Lay and ecclesiastical staff working in the tiny city state, are now using the swipe cards.
The cards have been issued to everyone from the lowest office staff to the heads of departments, even if they are priests and archbishops, though there has been no mention if Pope Benedict XVI carries one.
According to reports some elder clerics in the Vatican have complained that clocking in and out is a headache, especially when they have to leave on pastoral duty.
It is all part of a drive to increase efficiency and to make the Vatican more meritocratic.
Next year there are plans to introduce performance-related pay.
How language changes with time
I passed an attractive, but innocent-looking girl in the street market at Bugis, who sported a T-shirt with the opening lines of a quote from the famous suffragist Sarah Moore Grimké.Perhaps I just have a dirty mind, but not all Singapore-Chinese have perfect mastery of English, and I wonder if the girl realized the ambiguity which has crept into the language over the last hundred and fifty years or so (but, then again, the T-shirt printer could have completed the quote).
Unfortunately, I did not have a chance to ask for a photograph, but the T-shirt looked like this …
Wheelcahir jay walker
Not that kind of bank
Looking for a Citibank to depot some cash, I find one of those new kiosk style "outlets" which looks more like Old Chang Kee thank a bank.I wade through a shower of "executives" busily trying to foist leaflets onto passeryby and enter the "bank". It offers many "Services", but apparently they can't accept cash for deposit into an account. Just not "that kind" of bank, I suppose.
So I want round the corner to a "real" Citibank, where I handed over $3,000, a bank card and an Identity Card and said that I wanted to deposit $3,000. After a bit of paper shuffling the nice young lady said "here is your bank card, your Identity card, your receipt and your $3,000".
Read that last sentence again … (more)
Social engineering
After lunch I find myself near to Raffles Hotel and decide to treat myself to a single beer, since I haven't been there in a year or more.So I head for the Long Bar and position myself on stool, square in front of the oil painting of the semi-naked lady reclining n the tiger-skin rug.
Cue one Tiger. Although I only want one, the waitress is insistent that I might want to run a tab, so it would be best to hand over a credit card.
Having - miraculously - been paid, and being on my way from one bank to the next, I truthfully tell her that my credit card is maxxed, but I offer her a thousand dollar bill as a deposit on my tab.
Suddenly, a despot is no longer necessary. (more)
Goatse
Without a doubt, the single most disgusting T-shirt I have ever seen (no, don't ask. You either know or you don't. And if you don't know, then you don't want to know. Look, … remember that time you wondered what all the fuss was about with "two girls, one cups … ? Don't go there!!).
Irrational exuberance
My bank (DBS) are constantly writing and telephoning to remind me that my sole credit card is way over its $20,000 limit and demanding to know what I am going to do about it.Well, now I know what they are going to do about it.
Yesterday every stock market in the world plunged dramatically. And today I got home from work to find that the bank want to resolve my $2x,000 credit card debt by sending me another "pre-approved" credit card with a $20,000 limit.
I wonder how long I could live in Peru on $20,000.
Are your cats old enough to learn about jesus?
People often ask us when they should teach the Good News to their housecats. We have but one answer: "What are you waiting for?"
Think of the alternative: your cat mired in darkness for eternity because you put off a 10-minute conversation.
No such things as a free meal
I was cleaning out my camera and I found this. I can't remember where or when I took it, except that it was certainly in Singapore.
Now, I am not sure exactly what is "worth $3.90" - maybe the upgrade, maybe the entire meal - but it seems that I am expected to pay $3.90 for it.
Ah, got it! It's free to them - I pay them $3.90 for something "worth" $3.90.
Who says there's no such thing as a free meal?
Is this the best or worst gadget ever invented?
I do remember a few years ago that the Financial Times highlighted a British inventor of a vending machine which sold chips (french fries). No fish, though, and not wrapped in newspaper 
